Is Your Marriage at Risk of Financial Infidelity?

financial infidelity

More and more marriages are ending in divorce due to financial infidelity. Although the phrase is new, the problem isn’t. Couples have always fought about finances. Money issues are one of the leading reasons for divorce. It’s just the language that’s new. However, this new language is powerful. Could your marriage be at risk?

What is Financial Infidelity?

Of course, infidelity means that you are cheating on your spouse. Therefore, financial infidelity means that you’re cheating on your spouse with money. Of course, you aren’t having an affair with money. So then what is financial infidelity? Put simply, it means that you’re lying to partner about something related to your shared finances.

Examples of Financial Infidelity

Right now I’m reading Kathy Curto’s memoir Not for Nothing. She shares little vignettes about her mid-century childhood. Her father worked. Her mother was a housewife. Their relationship was tumultuous. In one vignette, Curto shares several ways that her mother squirrels money away. For example, she writes a check at the grocery store for more than the amount of groceries. She tells her husband she spent it all on groceries but keeps the cash back for herself.

Likewise, I know many women in the crafting community who don’t tell their husbands when they buy more craft supplies. It would cause a fight. They don’t want to deal with the fight. So they spend the money, hide their “stash” and never mention it to their spouse. These types of things are common. And yet, they are examples of financial infidelity.

What’s the Line? Do You Have to Tell Your Spouse Everything?

As with the other kind of infidelity, just what falls into the category of financial infidelity depends upon the boundaries of your relationship. Think of it this way: some couples think it’s okay to kiss someone else but not to go any further whereas other couples would consider this cheating. Likewise, what a couple considers a lie about money varies from relationship to relationship.

There’s also the issue of an outright lie vs. a lie of omission. You get an expensive new haircut. Your partner never asks about it. Is it financial cheating for you never to bring it up? That depends upon the unique agreements in your own marriage. These agreements may vary depending on all types of factors including:

  • Whether or not you both have jobs
  • If there’s a significant pay difference between your jobs
  • Whether all of your accounts are joint accounts or you keep some money separate
  • If you both do financial paperwork or only one of you handles it

Ultimately, it’s not the specific details that matter. Instead, what matters is that you and your partner set financial boundaries. You have to discuss them. You have to get on the same page. Then, you have to stick to the agreements that you’ve made. Otherwise, you’re at risk of committing financial infidelity.

Problematic Types of Financial Infidelity

Although each couple must set their own boundaries around financial infidelity, there are some common types that tend to wreak havoc in a marriage. First of all, if you agree to certain boundaries then lie about behavior that crosses those boundaries, you’re committing financial infidelity.

Additionally, if you place your partner at financial risk without their knowledge, then you’re committing financial infidelity. What this looks like can vary from relationship to relationship. For example, if you have agreed to each have your own separate credit cards, then it’s not infidelity to run your debt up without telling your partner. That’s what you’ve agreed to. However, if you’ve agreed to limit your debt then you run up credit card loans without their knowledge, that’s financial infidelity.

Broadly speaking, if you’re lying about or hiding any of your earning, spending, or saving then you’re marriage is at risk of financial infidelity.

Signs of Financial Infidelity

Perhaps you’re worried that your partner is committing financial infidelity. Here are some common warning signs:

  • They shut down any conversation about money.
  • You frequently see credit card expenses they won’t explain. Alternatively, their explanations don’t make sense.
  • When you go to use a credit card, it gets declined. It’s over limit or you have been removed from a joint account without your permission.
  • Your partner has changed their passwords to online financial accounts. They won’t share the new password.
  • It’s baffling to you where your partner has gotten the money to afford large new expenses.

If you are worried about financial infidelity, then you might want to seek help. There are therapists who are trained to help couples with money matters. Or you might just start with an open, honest conversation about setting some financial boundaries and see where that takes you.

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Boost Your Savings by Increasing Your Income

While we would all love to put some money aside in our savings for a rainy day, many people find this difficult. This is not because they don’t have the willpower to save, but rather because they simply don’t have enough money leftover each month to put aside in. This can create a problem if unexpected costs arise, or if you need to save up for something.

Fortunately, with today’s suburban lifestyle where most people have ready access to the internet, you can do something about the situation. If you are serious about saving, you can try earning more money online. In this article, we will look at some of the ways you can boost your income and save money with the help of modern technology.

Ideas for Boosting Your Income

So, what can you do to boost your income? Well, these days people go online for all sorts of financial reasons, like getting a loan, arranging commercial vehicle financing, and getting debt advice and budgeting. Another reason why people go online is to make money, and there are plenty of ways in which you can do this.

One of the things you can do to make some extra cash in your spare time is to use the skills you already possess. For instance, if you are a good researcher and enjoy writing, you could offer your services online to individuals and businesses looking for content writers. In today’s digital age, there are plenty who are looking for this type of service so you could make some serious cash. In fact, you could even turn it into a regular part-time or full-time career if it takes off.

If you have technical skills and you enjoy being creative, you may want to offer your services as a web designer in your spare time. Again, because of the age we live in, businesses are always on the lookout for good, affordable, and reliable web designers. If you can offer these qualities and you have the skills (or can learn), this is a great way to make some extra money. As with content writing, you could turn this into a part-time or full-time career, and you could work from a home office.

Finally, if you want to make money as a one-off to help boost your savings, you could sell items you no longer want or use online. Most of us have items that we do not use any longer, from DVDs and books to clothing, kids’ toys, furniture, and more. One man’s junk is another man’s treasure, as they say, so you could sell this online and make some money. At the same time, you can clear your home of clutter.

Get Your Savings Underway

No matter what sort of online job you choose, you can look forward to it as a practical means of generating more savings. You can then benefit from greater peace of mind, as you will some money put aside in case you need it.

5 Ways To Get Cash When You Need It Fast

Unexpected expenses always seem to pop up at the worst times. You may be in between paychecks, or need a lump sum of cash to pay off other bills, and need to make some money fast. Emergency car repairs or medical bills can wipe you out unless you have a way to get cash quickly.

With a bit of ingenuity and effort, there are plenty of ways to get extra funds when you are in a bind. While you may want to avoid scam-ridden deals that you find at many payday loan lenders, there are other options that can get you back in the black faster than you may think.

Sell some of your stuff at a garage sale, talk to a private lender about title loans in Bakersfield or join a research study to make cash fast. Take a look at some of these quick and easy ways to make some money when you really need it.

Garage or Online Sale

Gather all of your unwanted items and set them out for a garage sale. This is a great way to clear out your clutter and purge your home, garage and basement of the things that you no longer need. Barter with buyers for the best price and start collecting money right away.

Go online to a popular auction site like LetGo or eBay and advertise your items for sale. You can have a buyer in just minutes and money in your bank account right away.

Blood or Sperm Donation

There is always a need for blood donations. The Red Cross is always putting on blood drives to help keep their blood banks full and operational. Visit your local blood bank and sign up to donate blood or plasma. You can donate up to once a week. The compensation isn’t much, but it can get you started.

If you donate sperm, the compensation is much higher. In most places, a sperm donation will pay around $200. If you qualify, you can donate as often as you wish. Women have the option to donate their eggs, however, the process can take several weeks and isn’t as quick a solution to money issues.

Title Loan

If you own your own car, boat or RV you might qualify for a title loan. This type of secured loan is easy to get, especially if you have poor or no credit. Your collateral acts as a guarantee on your loan and can get you a larger lump sum in less than 48 hours.

Fill out a simple application, decide what you want to put up as collateral and collect your cash. It’s really that easy. As long as you keep to the payment schedule on your loan, you will retain ownership of your collateral.

Sell An Asset

If you need a larger lump sum, you might consider selling an asset. Selling will often bring you a larger amount than a secured loan. Advertise your asset including items like a vehicle, your boat, recreational vehicles or a piece of valuable art for sale. Take advantage of the online market to reach more potential buyers.

Participate In A Research Study

Private companies and educational institutes are always looking for people to participate in their research studies. Visit your local college websites to view listings of interesting studies that you can be a part of. Research studies can include testing out trial medications, taking part in a behavioral study, or psychological testing.